Hubby, Money, and Investing
Yes, I’ve been quiet recently. A little over a week ago I had a very eye-opening money talk with hubby that really threw me for a loop. Where to begin …?
It all started with a discussion about the economic “stimulus” payment that came in half of what we expected (granted, I hadn’t bothered to run the numbers through one of the website calculators out there). So instead of having $900 or $1200 to play with, we only got $600. I shouldn’t fuss, since we are in the ZERO % tax bracket. Hubby has asked for $150 of it, and I agreed, figuring he had some anniversary plans he was keeping secret.
Well, after the anniversary evening out, hubby asked if he could write the check for the money market/big emergency fund deposit for only $400 instead of $450 … Yes, it was “only” $50 but I thought I was being generous by letting him have one quarter of the “stimulus” to begin with! I of course wanted to stuff all but $50 of it into the big emergency fund.
It was time for another Big Money Discussion, with capital letters. I learned he feels “poor” because he doesn’t have as much spending money as he did before he went to Korea (and before I started budgeting). He learned (?) I have a deep psychological need to have a big honkin’ emeergency fund for security, as the expenses section of the budget keeps growing due to gasoline and food price increases combined with concerns about upcoming tuition bills. So far, so good …
Then I made the remark I wanted to hurry up, tighten the belt, and get that big emergency fund funded so I could move on to investing. Hubby said he didn’t like investing … he preferred to keep his money in his checking account, or maybe a money market account at best.
GASP!! CHOKE!!! cough, sputter … !!!!! Insert mental image of me banging my head against the desk! After making quite a few shocked noises, I asked him how he could say that …??!?
This is a basic synopsis of several conversations over the past week and a half: Hubby doesn’t understand investing. It’s a huge blow to my ego as a PF blogger that I can write things here on my blog … but can’t seem to explain why investing is a smart thing to my own husband. Hubby says this “investing idea” seems to be losing money, not making money so he’d rather just earn interest in a regular savings account, checking account, or a money market account.
“Ok, so just TEACH him about why investing is the best idea…”
That would work IF he was inclined to learn. Hubby feels he has his hands full with negotiating with re-up and studying for the promotion board, and I can almost SEE him tune out when I get started on the subject. His eyes either become unfocused or begin to wander about.
The best I’ve gotten from him in the time since he uttered that jaw-dropping sentence is “You take care of it … I don’t want to see it or bother with it. Just like my TSP.” Considering what the markets have been doing over the past year, I am extremely grateful the TSP only mails out annual statements.
So now I am thinking hard about how I can sneak little tiny microbits of investing info into our everyday conversations, since hubby is not inclined to sit down for an hour or longer crash course on what little I know about the subject. The problem is Hubby is every bit as stubborn as I am … but y’all probably figured that out months ago LOL He’d have to be, to marry me.
It sounds like hubby’s leave has been approved, so we will be heading down to Florida to spend a little time with my in-laws in less than two weeks. Perhaps I can get a little help from them. If not, there is still the 12 hour drive to get there and back … when he will be a “captive audience” so to speak! Wish me luck on this endeavor. I’ll probably need it.